- This is the first time in history we can save the human race by lying in front of the TV and doing nothing. Let’s not screw it the !!!k up
- In one week, we've seen how healthcare workers, truck drivers and grocery store employees are more important than NBA players, actors and the supposedly famous.
- Maybe now society will realize we can make it without celebrities and professional sports... but we can’t make it without farmers and ranchers!
- Hey creative community! Just a reminder that Shakespeare was quarantined for the plague when he wrote King Lear. No pressure!!!
- Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.
- I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.
- I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
- Still haven't decided where to go for Easter ----- The Living Room or The Bedroom
- PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
- Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.
- I don't think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we'd go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone
- This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog..... we laughed a lot.
- So, after this quarantine.....will the producers of My 600 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?
- Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.
- My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.
- Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.
- I'm so excited --- it's time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?
- I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I'm getting tired of Los Livingroom.
- Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.
- Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said "I hope I don't have the same teacher next year".... I'm offended.
- Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under
- Also highly contagious is kindness, patience, love, enthusiasm, and a positive attitude. Don’t wait to catch it from others...be the carrier!
- Still haven' decided where to go for Easter -- the Family Room or the Living Room.
- Remember when we thought we were going to have a bad week because of the time change, full moon, and Friday the 13th. We didn’t have a clue!
- Definition of irony: gas under one dollar a liter and no place to go...
- Your grandparents were called to war. You’re being called to sit on your couch You can do this!!
- With March and April cancelled, the next holiday is Cinco De Mayo - sponsored by Corona.
- Since everyone has started washing their hands like we’re supposed to, we’ll be working on shapes and colors next week.
- Due to panic buying, Walmart has opened register 3.
- Pro tip: if you get pulled over, just start coughing.
- All these kids who have been learning Common Core math are about to learn how to “Carry the One” from their new home school teachers
- That moment when you’re worried about the elderly and realize that you are the elderly...
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InformationThis page is intended as a vehicle for retirees to provide stories about their activities, travels, travails, and just about anything that they want to share. Our Association members will be advised how to submit items for this page. Write to us at [email protected]. Something to smile about when you are confined to homeYou have to laugh or go crazy today so we are inviting members to post the funny things they have found and to comment on those we post.
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